I’m kind of sad right now… I have so much fun just hanging at home having drinks. I wish that my friends liked doing this. They always want to go to clubs or bars though… I’m so over that. I would much rather hang out and be mellow and low key in a safe place. These guys are really nice. But they are so young. I feel like I’m so fucking old around these guys. I am into the same things as them though. I feel like I’m being immature. Or trying to be younger than I am. Maybe I’m trying to be young so I don’t have to grow up and be responsible.. I wish I went to school. I want a better job. I want to make more money. I want to be on my own :/ I feel like such a failure. I need to save as much as I can. I need to get a better job. I need to be better than I am. I need to face reality. I am not happy with my life how it is. The only thing that I’m happy about is my family. I want to be happy.